Matt Thomas

How not making it through Dry January isn’t a failure – it could just be the best thing that’s ever happened to you.

If you decided to take up the challenge of Alcohol Change UK’s Dry January to reap some of the well documented benefits of one month alcohol-free and you didn’t quite make it through, or if you fell at one of the first hurdles – don’t worry about it.

Maybe you were doing it to raise money for a charity, maybe you just felt like you could do with a break from the booze after a heavy Christmas. Or a heavier 2020. Maybe you were being “sober curious” and wanted to see what it was like. Or maybe you were doing it to keep family members or friends off your back. Maybe your doctor suggested you should have a go. Maybe you were feeling concerned about how much you were drinking, and it was a good opportunity. There are infinite possible reasons you might have tried  – and none of those reasons necessarily mean that you have a problem, and nor does not quite making it through the whole month alcohol-free. Particularly at the moment.  

As we’ve pointed out on many occasions, alcohol consumption has increased during the pandemic as an attempt to alleviate boredom or stress, as a coping mechanism, or just, “because I can,” after all, it’s always 6.00pm somewhere. Only a fraction of those people who have increased their intake of alcohol will become “problem drinkers.”

But. (And it’s a big one.) If you tried Dry January, and you really didn’t like it – you found you couldn’t make it through the month without a drink, maybe you found you couldn’t make it more than a day without a drink – or more than a few hours  - you were uncomfortable with the emotions and feelings that came up, you experienced physical withdrawals, your moods suffered, or you just couldn’t face life without a drink  - then maybe it’s time to have an open mind about whether or not there’s something else going on.

The expression “if you want to find out why you drank, stop drinking.” really rings true in this case. Did you accidentally uncover, through trying to stop drinking, why you drank in the first place?

Accepting that you have some kind of a drinking problem is not a weakness or curse. It’s very well documented and widely accepted that the complex reasons associated with the development of problem drinking are nothing to do with failure of personality.  In fact, for millions of people, coming to terms with, and seeking help for problem drinking, has proved to be a blessing – the start of a whole new way of life. But having a drinking problem is still so heavily stigmatised that many people will need to get really unwell  – tragically some will even die - before they accept that they need help. And the sad truth is that it doesn’t have to be that way. You don’t have to reach rock bottom before you accept help.

Sometimes, a small thing such as not making it through Dry January could be the catalyst that someone needs to change their life completely. And maybe that’s you.

It took a certain amount of courage for you to give Dry January a go in the first place. So congratulations for even trying.

The labels other people give us can be harmful and hurtful, and we’ll sometimes do anything to avoid them. But allowing yourself the option to consider if your relationship with alcohol is problematic might just be the kindest thing you could do for yourself, your family, friends and work colleages - and could even save your life.

There are as many paths into recovery from problem drinking as there are people, but none of them can truly start until there is a level of acceptance that a problem might exist. Then the door can be opened.

So do a bit of reading. Our advice page is a good place to start.  Call a helpline, contact the Clouds House team  and discuss options with someone who understands and will not judge. You don’t have to do this alone.

Just please remember - not having made it through Dry January isn’t a failure – it could just be the best thing that’s ever happened to you.

Alcohol withdrawl can be a medical emergency. If you or someone you know is experiencing alcohol withdrawl please contact your GP, 111 or 999. 

If you want to discuss options for residential treatment at Clouds House,  click here.